We have looked at restoration of femininity and then we went to restoration of manhood, I believe there’s been a lot for us to learn.

In the next series we get to learn how to communicate love. I pray as we read and learn the stereotypes we have built over the years will be done away with, our mindsets will be changed, and we will better understand how to convey love.



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RESTORATION OF FEMININITY 18 – Pride And Self-Righteousness


Some of us need to submit to the knowledge of what is really in our hearts before we can move to the next stage of blessing. Pride will keep us from coming clean with God. Self-righteousness will keep you from experiencing the flow of God’s cleansing and liberating power. It is that power that enables us to submit to the wishes of men.

If the words “I am sorry, I was wrong” are words you find difficult to say, while “I told you so” comes easily, consider the state of your heart. It is probably not ripe for submission and the blessings that come with it.

JER 17: 9, 10 The heart is deceitful above all things, and it is exceedingly perverse and corrupt and severely, mortally sick! Who can know it? I the Lord search the mind, I try the heart, even to give to every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his doings.

DEUT 8:2 And you shall remember all the way which the Lord your God led you these forty years in the wilderness, to humble you and to prove you, to know what was in your mind and heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not.

Submission is not only a test of our love for Him; it is a test of our strength. Sometimes its hard to submit – but it must always be voluntary.

God will never force us to do anything. He has given each one a free will.

Until we learn to submit, not that it’s easy, we will have no inkling of the blessings that should have been ours, since many are tied to submission.


Credits – Amanda Buys.

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The Foundation
A house is not a home until the feminine touch has been applied. To build a good, solid house in which a man can feel at home, you need to begin with a sound foundation of TRUST.

Virginity on the wedding night lays a strong foundation to begin with. Her “fountain” is for her husband only (Proverbs 5). A man needs to know he can trust his woman – hide his heart, his dreams and his secrets with her.

The Frame
Prudence will keep a house firm no matter what is going on within its walls.

PROV 19:14 House and riches are the inheritance from fathers, but a wise, understanding and prudent wife is from the Lord.

PROV 12:23 A prudent man (woman) is reluctant to display his knowledge, but the heart of self-confident fools proclaims their folly.

PROV 13:16 Every prudent man (woman) deals with knowledge, but a self-confident fool exposes and flaunts his folly.

Prudence and wisdom walk hand in hand. Prudence is the frame, wisdom is the roof.

PROV 8:12 I, Wisdom from God, make prudence my dwelling, and I find out knowledge and discretion.

It is God’s purposes that supply the mortar that keeps the whole house standing. It is our relationship with Him that furnishes us with true wisdom.

PROV 9:10 The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning of Wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight and understanding.

There is something special about a woman who masters the art of gently leading her man to see reason and to make wise decisions for her house.

Art is not about manipulation. It’s about possessing an understanding of the subject and the appropriate technique of rendering. So, don’t trill for your husband to hear you, but speak to him like the lady in Songs of Solomon; with gentility and respect🙂

PROV 9:1 Wisdom has built her house; she has hewn out and set up her seven perfect number of pillars.

Wisdom keeps the house in order and covers it from all forces that threaten to destroy it.

What are the seven pillars that make it able to withstand the storms of life and relationships?
– Prudence
– Knowledge
– Discretion
– Counsel
– Sound Judgement
– Understanding
– Power

PS 127:1 Except the Lord builds the house, they labour in vain who build it; except the Lord keeps the city, the watchman wakes but in vain.

Dear Heavenly Father, You are the Potter, and I am the clay. You have built my house. You have furnished it with the fruit of the Spirit. You have filled it with the aroma of Your anointing. You have decorated me in wisdom and virtue, such that I am a sanctuary to all who dwell in my presence. I receive the gift of discernment to truly listen and hear the needs of others. I receive instruction in the ways of women according to your original design. I receive strength to withstand the tests of storms and trials.

I stand fast when the very foundations of all I believe in and hope for are shaken. As I stand fast in Your promise to be the Cornerstone that stands firm in my life, I decree that I am an oasis, a quiet place and a haven for the hearts of those You send my way. In Jesus’ Name, AMEN.



Credits- Amanda Buys

Image source – single black

Next, we will be looking at a hot topic – the strength of submission.



Every one has a definition for a house, and here are mine:

  • It wards off the elements.

  • It covers you in times of rain, storms, heat, cold, snow, anything that could affect your health.

  • It keeps you warm in the winter and cool in the summer. It harbours all of your possessions and keeps them safe.

  • It gives you safe boundaries and consistency – you return to the same place every day.

  • It provides access to others, as people know where to come to find you.

  • It offers you a place to feed, rest and even cleanse yourself.

As a wife, a godly woman, the man in your life should feel that his heart, his secrets, and his emotions are safe with you. You should be his haven of consistency, the one who is always there, and the one he can alwayscount on. He knows what to expect from you because your character is so sound.

He should have access to your heart, your softness, your reassurances and your counsel all the time, and vice versa. You should be his oasis; a dominant yet pleasant person to be around.

He should be refreshed in your presence. Nothing can bring him more joy or pain than to be welcomed or spurned by the woman he longs after.

Songs OF SOL 4:9 -10 9 You have ravished my heart and given me courage, my sister, my promised bride; you have ravished my heart and given me courage with one look from your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. 10 How beautiful is your love, my sister, my promised bride! How much better is your love that wine! And the fragrance of your ointments than all spices!

Make a house for him not because he is perfect but because you have a choice to do so. It is that which will change a wanderer and make joyful the only that only stayed because they didn’t want to hurt you.


Credits – Amanda Buys

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Women we have been tardy in teaching the younger generation what our mothers or those before them taught us -we are the home builders. We also need to go a little deeper in our teaching that  a man wants or rather needs three things:

  • To be well fed.

  • Well loved in the sexual sense.

  • And well appreciated.

What do we get out of it?

  • You’ll be well loved.
  • Well kept.

  • And well satisfied.

Your home is more that just your physical house – it is your household. It is the hearts of those who surround you. The heart is where we all really live.

It is the way everyone under your roof is affected by your presence. You get to set the stage for how everyone feels – children, mate, friends, yourself. Your home reflects who you are.

PROV 14:1 Every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands.

Everything revolves around the woman of the house.

PROV 21:9 It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, on the flat oriental roof, exposed to all kinds of weather, than in a house shared with a nagging, quarrelsome, and faultfinding woman.

PROV 21:19 It is better to dwell in a desert land than with a contentious woman and with vexation.

PROV 27:15 A continual dripping on a day of violent showers and a contentious woman are alike.

PROV 9:13 The foolish woman is noisy; she is simple and open to all forms of evil, she wilfully and recklessly knows nothing whatever of eternal value.

PROV 12:4 A virtuous and worthy wife, earnest and strong in character, is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is a rottenness in his bones.

That about sums it up.

A woman can choose to use the power she has to make him or break him.

She is his protection.

The man is called to walk in front of the woman to ward off opposition and danger, but the woman has been created to surround that man and protect his heart. Even single women – every man that crosses your path should feel better when he is in your presence.

Don’t make this a sexist matter; that’s how we are wired, deep down we know it and there is no two ways about it😊😊


Credits: Amanda Buys

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Our role has been defined and redefined over the years depending on which angle you look at it from. However, at the core, we are meant
– To preserve the life of her children.
– To keep them from being devoured by the dragon.
– To nurture purpose.
– To blow on the embers of those little spirits until their hands reach up to God.
– To secure the blessing.
– To guard their inheritance.
– To release them into becoming pillars of destiny.

Motherhood is a precious assignment from God. It has a season and to be candid, with the current fads, many are losing out on this precious responsibility of naturing. However, we ought to enjoy the identity of being a mother. God chose you on purpose for such a time as this.

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for the gift of my children. I am humbled that You thought me worthy of watching over someone who is so precious to You. I receive all the wisdom, strength and insight that I need to complete my assignment in a way that will be pleasing to You. I receive guidance in the way that I should take even as I instruct these ones that You have entrusted in my care.
As I commit them to Your care, I thank You that You will keep them safe in all their ways. I receive an increased sense of discernment to recognize the work of the enemy in my children’s lives. I receive the strength to battle against the forces that will seek to pull their hearts away from You, to break their spirits and bend their wills.
When I grow weary, I receive strength for my arms and a renewal of my faith in Your ability to keep us all.
By the authority that You’ve given me over the lives of my children, through Christ, I abort the plans of the enemy and his agenda for destroying the purposes of God in my children. I receive guidance for my prayer life to strategically call forth the destiny of my children. I declare that the inheritance You have reserved for them is secure.
But most of all, Lord, in those times when the going gets tough, I will recognize that children are only part of my reward for answering Your call. I a rm my worth when the world is telling me I have no value, and I find my validation and all that is truly worthwhile in You. In Jesus’ Name, AMEN.

Credits – Amanda Buys
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RESTORATION OF FEMININITY 12 – Domineering Mothers


Mothers come in all skins but there are the domineering mothers. These are they that become dangerously attached to their sons, replacing their mate with their son.

Their own search for the praises of men and for the love and fulfilment they fail to receive from their mate propels them to enter into emasculating relationships with their sons. This is out of God’s order. Sons are not created to fill the void that you’ve determined your mate won’t fill. Children are not made to be bargaining tools and instruments of manipulation to retaliate against, insult, draw, bind, or repel the man in your life. They are little people who come laden with purpose and endless possibilities that must not be distorted.

Mothers, be living New Testament examples of the type of person you would like your children to become. Speak wisdom into your children, help them to tap into the boundless possibilities within themselves because of the power of God at work within them. Be like Jesus in the home. Give your son the male affirmation he needs in order to be a man and let your daughter grow up affirmed as a woman, knowing she deserves to be loved properly.

This enables a son to “leave and cleave” and a daughter to grasp the concept of walking in oneness with her husband. This builds solid men and women who fulfil their purpose and further the world’s destiny.
This is the only winning strategy ever.

Credits – Amanda Buys
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