BREAKING THE CURSE OF ALCOHOLISM – 8. IT WILL BE WAR!!

If you don’t know when the enemy is talking to you, how are you going to know when to fight it? Or if you can’t recognize when they are talking to you, how are you going to recognize when they are trying to get back in? God will many times make us defeat the demons while they are inside of us. The Lord will delay your deliverance sometimes so you will know how to fight and be able to stay free after you receive freedom. Passive warriors rarely win battles.

Take these patterns one by one, and root them out of your life. Go to work on these areas and reclaim your life. Reclaim your mind, will, emotions, finances, and your relationships with other people. Then get prayer for deliverance. The demons involved are spirits of family destruction. Ask the Lord to expose them and how they are working in your life so that you can have a life of plenty again. You can have your life restored. The Lord wants to set you free.

Drugs and alcohol leave residues in your body which you can ask the Lord to cleanse in Jesus Name.

PRAYER
Father in Jesus Name I receive cleansing of all alcohol or drug residues that are left in my body. I purge my organs and I decree restoration to them. I declare that my mind, my intestines, my liver, my pancreas, my stomach, and all of the organs, glands, tissues and membranes that were touched, affected or destroyed by alcohol are healed in Jesus name! AMEN.

The prolonged used of alcohol also causes the blood vessels in the nose to burst. Have you ever seen the nose of a full blown alcoholic? It becomes very bulbous. The same thing happens to the eyes. The redness of the eyes, and enlarged nose are the tiny blood vessels bursting. The effects of alcohol on the blood are well known. People who have been drinking and then cut themselves, such as a fight or an accident, usually bleed profusely. This is because the blood has been thinned and will not clot as quickly. You can declare healing in this.

How many great men of God would have utilized the deliverance message in their ministry if they had been able to see deliverance in the scriptures? I choose to have my eyesight, my family, my finances, and I am not going to let the devil take it.

Other areas that I encourage you to attack and get prayer are: Arrested development, Shame, And the mind with no soundness.

These are all categories that are associated with alcohol.

Will freedom come over night? God can work miracles, but it probably will not come over night. You are going to have to learn how to fight the spirits of alcohol.

Why didn’t God just transport the people to the Promised Land? Because they needed to learn how to fight. They needed to learn how to discern God’s voice from the voice of the enemy. They needed to be strengthened for the battle coming when they crossed over the Jordan river to fight the giants of the land. God doesn’t fight all of our battles, but He does give us the weapons to be victorious.

Deliverance is a walk, not an event. Many people were taught wrong. They thought, “Well, can’t I just go and in Jesus Name, get it cast out?” No. The Lord gives us the pattern in the Old Testament.

Exodus 23:29-30
29 I will not drive them out from before you in one year, lest the land become desolate [for lack of attention] and the wild beasts multiply against you.
30 Little by little I will drive them out from before you, until you have increased and are numerous enough to take possession of the land.

If you had a garden plot that was 40 acres large, and God cleaned it completely out, and you had only a little hoe to work it with, by the time you reached the other end, it would be completely grown over with weeds.

God’s Principles are “Line upon line, precept upon precept.” This is how the Lord works, so don’t get discouraged if it takes awhile. Just keep after them and with time you will get free.

Do we have authority over the demons? You bet. Will it take time? Probably. You can’t change everything over night. A soul is very complex, and the variables to restoring and delivering someone are endless.

Credits: Amanda Buys

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BREAKING THE CURSE OF ALCOHOLISM – 7 Alcoholic Family Personalities

Once again, the alcohol demons fall under the category of family destruction. The entire family can take on alcoholic characteristics that require deliverance, even though one may never have taken a drink. Each member of the family is required or expected to move and act as pawns in a chess game. Demonic oppression can be dictating their lives.

When children from alcoholics grow up, they tend to either become rescuers or deniers. Demonic roles are the same from all dysfunctional families. (religious, alcoholic, or drug.)

1 Samuel 18:18 David said to Saul, Who am I, and what is my life or my father’s family in Israel, that I should be the king’s son-in-law?

Scripture reveals that a person’s life is often wrapped up or bound with family patterns:

1) Rescuer, usually first born.

  • Overly responsible, substitute parent.
  • Feel they have to always overachieve.
  • Called to be a person for others.
  • All things to all people.
  • Service to others is it’s own reward.
  • Needs of others must be meet before your own.
  • Strive to be perfect.
  • Shoulder the responsibilities of people outside their circle of responsibility.
  • Have difficulty having fun, never played growing up.

2) Scape Goat

  • It’s always their fault, take on all the blame.
  • Under achiever.
  • Hear constant voices of failure, you can’t do it.
  • Fear of punishment.
  • Fear of people’s anger.
  • Always the one in trouble.
  • The family’s way of not looking at reality.
  • What do I have to do to get people to pay attention to me?
  • Relives parents’ fears.

3) Family Clown often the youngest

  • Very bright, witty.
  • Performs a lot.
  • Keeps the family laughing. You might think therefore he doesn’t have a problem.
  • Often very detained.
  • Hiding real self from people, (I can’t let them see me hurting) lives secretive.
  • Irresponsible with life, lives for fun.

4) Lost middle child

  • Withdrawn
  • Victim.
  • Fantasy (maturing process block lives in unreal world).
  • Idolatry of father.
  • If male, often weak.
  • Female, fantasy, Dad’s little princess; pamper me, take care of me.
  • Have hard time with real life, money, work, and people who don’t recognize I’m a queen/king, it’s your job to take care of me attitude.
  • The one that never gets in deliberate trouble.
  • Blames others for their problems.
  • Rescue me, Cinderella attitude.

Other Phases include:

  • The con artist.
  • The aggressive, irresponsible. Has to be taught, this one ends up in a reform school.
  • The anxious/fearful fear arrests life-maturing processes, obsessive.
  • The grouchy, irritable, snobbish, don’t touch me.
  • The sex addict.
  • The lethargic, self pity, remorse, despair.

Where do you belong? Never mind, there is help on the way.

Credits: Amanda Buys

BREAKING THE CURSE OF ALCOHOLISM – 6 Alcohol Spirits And Patterns In The Scriptures cont’d

Joel 1:5 Awake, you drunkards, and weep; wail, all you drinkers of wine, because of the [fresh] sweet juice [of the grape], for it is cut off and removed from your mouth.

The alcoholic has problems with spiritual insight, much less caring about spiritual matters. God is telling them in this verse that they need to wake up! You want to shake them and say, “Wake up and look at your life! Look at what you are doing to your family and loved ones! Consider your ways!”

Every day as you are fighting to get out of these patterns, command your mind to wake up. Fight against the anaesthetic mind. This feels like a veil over the mind. It’s like you’re awake, but drugged. Break off all of the steel caps on the mind that blocks your thinking.

We know that every time you drink, you are killing brain cells. You may say, “Well, I wasn’t using them anyway,” My response to that would be that you don’t have that many to lose. You need all that you can get. Tell your mind to wake up every morning, until your mind begins to function.

If God could raise a dead body back to life, He could bring back all of the dead brain cells that you killed.

Pray thus: Lord every brain cell that I killed by my use of alcohol, I command back to life, in the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ!

You can restore your mind by reclaiming and casting these spirits out and asking God to heal all damage you have done to your body.

The biggest battle will be with the strong man of Denial. You need to learn to recognize them. You must apply scripture to the ungodly patterns of the mind, disagree with them, take back any ground given and then get prayer on that area. This process can be very lengthy because you need to learn to identify the enemy.

Be very wary of those who proclaim, “speak and it’s done deliverance.” We have never found this to be the case in order to get to the stronger deeper entrenched emotions. The enemy will simply not give up without a fight even though we have superior weapons in the Name and Blood of Jesus. Consider instead, God’s mercy of not setting someone free from an enemy in which they haven’t learn to recognize it yet.

If God allowed, “speak and it’s done prayer,” how would you stand against them when they try and return, if you couldn’t recognize and discern the lies of the enemy while inside of you. Your last state would be worst than the first.

God in His mercy will delay your freedom until you learn to battle, recognize and defeat the enemy while on the inside. This takes time but ultimately gives lasting deliverance. This is also in keeping with Biblical pictures of warfare where God had the children of Israel defeat the “internal enemy” in the Promised Land.

Credits: Amanda Buys

DEALING WITH GRIEF 24

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DIVORCE CONT’D – Self-care tips:

😌Make time each day to nurture yourself. Help yourself heal by scheduling daily time for activities you find calming and soothing. Go for a walk in nature, listen to music, enjoy a hot bath, get a massage, read a favorite book, or savor a warm cup of tea.

😌Pay attention to what you need in any given moment and speak up to express your needs. Honor what you believe to be right and best for you even though it may be different from what your ex or others want. Say “no” without guilt or angst as a way of honoring what is right for you.

😌Stick to a routine. A divorce or relationship breakup can disrupt almost every area of your life, amplifying feelings of stress, uncertainty, and chaos. Getting back to a regular routine can provide a comforting sense of structure and normalcy.

😌Take a time out. Try not to make any major decisions in the first few months after a separation or divorce, like starting a new job or moving to a new city. If you can, wait until you’re feeling less emotional so that you can make better decisions.

😌Avoid using alcohol, drugs, or food to cope. When you’re in the middle of a breakup, you may be tempted to do anything to relieve your feelings of pain and loneliness. But using alcohol, drugs, or food as an escape is unhealthy and destructive in the long run. It’s essential to find healthier ways of coping with painful feelings.

😌Explore new interests. A divorce or breakup is a beginning as well as an end. Take the opportunity to explore new interests and activities. Pursuing fun, new activities gives you a chance to enjoy life in the here-and-now, rather than dwelling on the past.

😌Making healthy choices: Eat well, sleep well, and exercise.
When you’re going through the stress of a divorce or breakup, healthy habits easily fall by the wayside. You might find yourself not eating at all or overeating your favorite junk foods. Exercising might be harder to fit in because of the added pressures at home and sleep might be elusive. But all of the work you are doing to move forward in a positive way will be pointless if you don’t make long-term healthy lifestyle choices.

You are fighting from the victor’s side🤗🤗

Credits – Amanda Buys

The ‘Dating Game’ vs. COVENANT.

As strange as it may sound, dating is part of the REASON why our DIVORCE rate is so high … how does dating help us practice for divorce?

Because we make a COMMITMENT or promises that are a form of COVENANT to another person … and then we BREAK them.

We have not learned how to WORK through problems and issues. Instead, we have learned to MOVE ON when there are problems. Our souls continue to seek after the EXCITEMENT of a new relationship and we may have problems with finding SATISFACTION in the attention of just ONE person.

Dating and sexual DESIRES.
Sexual desires can be satisfied WITHOUT intercourse, such as heavy-petting. This will always lead to WRONG sexual imprinting. Many teenagers use drugs and alcohol, which leads to a break down in self-control and creates an inability to say, “NO to sexual behaviour. Their sexuality is then imprinted with the feelings of alcohol and/or drugs. The consequence will be that when married, their sexuality will need to go with alcohol and/or drugs, in order to be satisfied.

Dating and STEALING.
Dating is DANGEROUS because it leads to robbery. GOD HATES stealing. If we take another person’s virginity, we have just ROBBED their future husband or wife. If we take a part of another person’s HEART and BREAK it, we have just ROBBED their future husband or wife. If we DAMAGE a person’s ability to TRUST, we have just ROBBED their future husband or wife and them. It can also ROB the purity and the SPECIALNESS of your wedding day and wedding night. Until we are ready to make a life time, being in love is just a LIE.

Just as GOD’s love for us has caused Him to make an EVERLASTING COVENANT with us, TRUE LOVE must be MATURE enough to enter into COVENANT.

BUT how can I have FUN if I dont DATE?
You can have fun by doing things in the SAFETY of a group.

BUT how will I ever find the RIGHT person if I don’t DATE?
You don’t have to. You can leave that job up to your earthly father … and ABBA FATHER. He will SPEAK to your heart and let you know, “This is the one I have CHOSEN for you. By getting the witness of your PARENTS, pastors, and other spiritual LEADERS, you protect yourself from making a MISTAKE that will affect the REST of your life.

There are a lot of WRONG reasons to get MARRIED … the ONLY right reason is because GOD has said, “This is the time and this is the one.

Wow”, you may say, but most of your questions will answered in the next few posts.🙂

Credits – Amanda Buys

RESTORING YOUR SEXUALITY 34 – Help, I am married to a sex addict! cont’d

Picking up from the previous post……….

One of the hardest things to do is to separate love from the addiction. Yes, your husband can still love you and yet be addicted to pornography. My daughters loved me, but they were still addicted to alcohol and drugs.

However, the addiction keeps them from demonstrating the love in a healthy manner and at times their addiction may even take a higher priority.

However, we can’t say, “If you loved me, you wouldn’t do this.” No, if they were not addicted, they wouldn’t do it. We have to support them as they walk through their recovery.

They also need our spiritual warfare. We need to direct our anger towards the spirit realm, to spirits of lust, pornography, masturbation, adultery, perversion, etc. If you do not understand spiritual warfare, it is important that you find information on it.

You need to be equipped. You are in a war whether you like it or not. You must know your authority as a believer. You must learn the weapons of your warfare. The Word of God says that you own your spouse’s body. You are one. You must begin to take dominion over what God has given you.

Spiritual warfare also helps you not to feel so helpless and hopeless. There really is something you can do to help. Again, you can’t do all of it. The addict has to make right choices but your prayers can sure help!

I realize that this is much easier said than done but you cannot let their addiction affect your self-image. It is not what you lack that has caused the problem; it is what they are. I know of beautiful women with lovely personalities who have husbands addicted to pornography.

You are not the problem. Don’t allow their addiction to affect your self-worth. You are not crazy. It is not your fault. Their addiction issues are usually rooted in childhood issues that were there long before you came along.

Make sure you take care of yourself, exercise and eat properly. Neglecting yourself will not solve the problem. Be careful of becoming jealous and obsessive; always wondering what he is doing, is he looking at someone, where has he been. It can begin to rule your life.

You must trust the Lord to give you discernment when things are out of order. Until then go on with your life. Pray that all things will be exposed. They will be. God is faithful. The Word of God tells us that a man who covers his sin will not prosper. God wants sin uncovered.

Another cycle often takes place with addictions that you need to be aware of because it can affect you. Often while the addiction is happening, the spouse will be very supportive. They will hold everything together and believe for healing, however, when recovery truly starts, that is when they let loose.

Their true anger comes to the surface, they begin to fall apart and now they are resentful for all the years when there was no healing. The addict is bewildered. Now is when they think their spouse is going to throw a party, strike up the band and have a parade in their honor.

But they just want to kill them and punish them for the past. Actually, this is part of recovery. However, some people get stuck in this mode. You can’t stay there. You have to work through the anger, the resentment, regret and bitterness. The addict must realize this is part of the process or they will throw in the towel and say, “It doesn’t matter what I do, she is never happy.”

Eventually, if continual progress is made, the addict stays clean, the spouse gets over being mad, the family learns new ways of interacting and they can live happily ever after. Now all that can be said in one sentence but in reality, it can take years to walk out. I will not lie to you and tell you it will all be easy.

It won’t be. There will be heart aches, disappointments, ups and downs but there can also be great victories, a closer relationship with the Lord and a restored marriage and family.

🙂Make sure the addiction doesn’t consume you. It is already consuming one family member. Have fun, enjoy your family. Don’t allow the addiction to rob these years of your life.

🙂Don’t be ashamed, there are a lot of women dealing with the same issues. They could be sitting right next to you in church. Reach out for help.

🙂Educate yourself. If necessary find a good support group. If there’s not one in your area that just deals with sexual issues, join one that supports recovery of any sort. It will still help.

🙂Make sure you stay close to God. Don’t get mad at Him. He is not the problem. He wants your husband free even more than you do. He died for it.

🙂Learn more about co-dependency. Set healthy boundaries in all areas of your life.

🙂You may not only have to forgive your husband but any other women involved as well. Don’t become his Holy Ghost, let the Lord convict him of his sinfulness.

🙂Use wisdom in who you open up to. Make sure they can keep confidence. You will not help his shame level if he’s not sure who you have told. Once recovery is complete, his shame will turn to testimony of God’s grace.

🙂Keep a journal. It will help you get out your emotions. It’s also a good way to see progress when you get too close to the situation.

AND FINALLY, DON’T BLAME YOURSELF!
Assignment

Write down your feelings related to your spouse’s sexual addiction.
Write down your fears on setting boundaries in the relationship.
What areas of co dependency do you see in your own life? How do you cover up for or enable your spouse?
The journey is definitely not easy, but staying on course is the on,y thing that will yield you results.

Credits – Amanda Buys

RESTORATION OF MANHOOD 25 – Staying power

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A MAN’S GREATEST STRENGTH
A man’s strength lies in these things;
– To make and keep promises.
– Refusing to turn from his commitment.
– It is this staying power that makes and marks a man.
– Not bungee jumping, playing rugby, etc.
– Certainly not leaving your wives.
– Not abandoning your families.

The curse of our day is not so much the AIDS epidemic as it is men who don’t know what a man is and who cut and run from their wives and families.

Some statistics…
– Through most of the 70’s and 80’s, a million children a year watched their parents split-up.
– Over fifty million kids are growing up in homes without a father.
– 70% of men in prison grew up without a father.

Our world is falling apart for lack of kings, warriors, mentors and lovers, for lack of men who will stay and who will keep their word. Keeping your word is critical.

The calling of every man is to offer stability to a world full of chaos.

We live in a “hope so” world. There are few certainties in this life. We “hope…”
– That our marriages will work out
– That we will find fulfillment
– That our children will turn out okay
– That we’ll be able to keep a decent job.

A real man brings certainty to his world by the power of a promise. Promise making and keeping is at the heart of godliness.

At the heart of God – at the core of His nature – is the making and keeping of promises. All Scripture hangs on a promise – a series of covenants.

Out of the whole world, two people – a man and a woman – chose each other. There will always be someone else more beautiful, intelligent, wealthy, witty, competent, sensitive or sensual, But the power of that choice, that promise should keep them together with no question of finding a “better mate”.

The toxin of comparison should be utterly neutralized and washed away by the sacred anti-toxin of promise.

At the heart of staying power is SACRIFICE – giving one’s self up for the good of another.

Our example is: THE LORD JESUS CHRIST.
When He could have turned away from the cross, He stayed on course all the way to Calvary. When He could have come down from the cross and sidestepped the suffering, He stayed. He persevered and “stayed under” all the way until that moment came when He could cry out, “It is finished”.

Why did He do that?
– So that through His resurrection power alive in your lives, you can become the kind of man He called you to be.
– You can hang in there and face anything life or death of hell has to throw at you – because He did it all before you.

Credits – Amanda Buys.
Image source – blackdoctor.org