UNDERSTANDING REJECTION 2


We ALL know REJECTION!
📌Rejection from FRIENDS,
📌Not being picked for the team,
📌Not being the PRETTIEST girl for the boys,
📌Struggling with our WEIGHT,

Then the deeper TRAUMAS of rejection from PARENTS, or the rejection that comes from ABUSE (sexual, physical, emotional).

Some of the DEEPEST rejection is from our PARENTS … a child knows his parents SHOULD love him! We also grow up hearing SO MANY negative statements about ourselves!

All of this causes us to believe: “I’m DAMAGED”, “I’m DIRTY”, “I’m DIFFERENT”, “There is something WRONG with ME!”

We know babies learn through sight, touch, and audio. This is why they need to SEE and FEEL new things. Why they need to DISCOVER. And why they ask SO MANY questions! If we weren’t allowed to do this — to GROW and LEARN, to be uniquely “NORMAL” … if we constantly heard the message that we are not WORTH the EFFORT to expand our KNOWLEDGE … these EXPERIENCES will be filed in our REJECTION FOLDER (in our subconscious mind), from which we REACT and LIVE from!

Strengths vs. WEAKNESSES.
As a practical exercise, write down TEN positive character qualities in your life, and only TWO weaknesses! All the things you HATE about yourself has to do with your BEHAVIOURS. We are so heavily programmed/focused on our WEAKNESSES, we can’t find our STRENGTHS!

In spite of the pain, we have survived — SURVIVAL is our strength. When we bring that strength to maturity, our survival instincts become our MOTIVATION to achieve our GOALS.

We need to be WASHED in the FATHER’s LOVE for us to KNOW we have VALUE because of HIS LOVE for us. And even in our MESS and ARRESTED development, we have STRENGTHS and qualities … they just need to be MATURED and BALANCED!

For example, your STRENGTH may be CARING for others. Now because of REJECTION, you may care TOO MUCH … but this is still a STRENGTH! You may be a CARETAKER, but with control because of FEAR. You need to grow and mature, to learn to care without control and/or manipulation — to understand Godly/balanced caring for people is a tremendous strength.

Power of WORDS.
How MANY of you have had a COMPLIMENT in the past 24 hours? How did you receive it? Were you COMFORTABLE? Saying “thank you” is so difficult because of SELF-REJECTION. We do not see our VALUE. We do not see our STRENGTH.

Maybe you have a WEIGHT problem. To HIDE your self-rejection you have to make a PLAN … crack FAT jokes to DIFFUSE what others will say. I hurt myself FIRST so others have much LESS to say! Self-REJECTION is when you are afraid that people might say something that will HURT … so we rather hurt OURSELVES.

We always have more strengths than we have weaknesses. But, we HATE the weaknesses we have and that is ALL we FOCUS on.
We spend HUGE amounts of TIME and ENERGY trying to AVOID rejection: We MANIPULATE, we CONTROL, we live in DENIAL.

We all know the WAYS in which we deal with REJECTION.
❇️We become like the person we hate because of the injustice of maybe a parent who was stern and strict.
❇️Or maybe an alcoholic parent, and we hated what they did to us so desperately — that it took so much of our think-time — that we conformed to our think-time and became what we hated the most. Then someone says: “You’re just like your FATHER!”, “You’re just like your MOTHER!”
That could trigger you into a huge reactive explosion! You say — “I hate that man! How can you say I am just like _____?!” We become like the one we focus on and we pick up their negative traits, and that goes into our self-REJECTION folder.

But ABBA Father put in us MORE pluses than MINUSES! This is the JOURNEY of MATURITY and GROWTH!
Can I hear an Amen?

Credits – Amanda Buys

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