RESTORING YOUR SEXUALITY 42 – Ministry cont’d


Let me give you a couple of examples:

 

The Lord brings back the memory of a young boy being molested by his teacher. He remembers the room, the smells. He forgives the teacher and pours out his complaint. Then he asks the Lord to reveal Himself.

 

He sees Jesus standing in the room with tears running down His face. Suddenly he breaks, and begins to weep, “Jesus did care, He was there all along.” If Jesus is crying, it’s okay for him to cry, too. The feelings of abandonment disappear. The bound up emotions are released.

 

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A woman was raped. The Lord brings her back to the day it happened. She really doesn’t want to go there. She has been running from that memory for 20 years and covering it up with drugs and alcohol.

 

Today God’s grace is there to help her to get in touch with the pain and trauma. She forgives the rapist and begins to pour out her feelings. “She has been robbed of daily life. She has lived in fear. She has not been able to enjoy sex with her husband. She has felt dirty and violated.”

 

Feelings of anger, hatred and revenge come out. Now it’s time to ask the Lord to reveal Himself and to bring healing.

 

At first it’s hard. Nothing seems to be happening. The Lord reveals that she is still ashamed and does not want Him to see her in that condition.

 

She finally releases her shame to Him and asks Him to reveal Himself in the memory. Suddenly, she sees the Lord, He is pushing the rapist off of her. Now she remembers how the man heard something and ran away. “The Lord was there!”

 

And then she sees the Lord lovingly taking her in His arms and gently wiping her face. He says, “Daughter this was not your fault. And I shall severely punish the enemy on your behalf. Rise and be made whole.”

 

Suddenly the feelings of self-accusation disappear. She didn’t do anything to cause the rape. It wasn’t her fault. The feelings that no one is ever there for her are gone. Her identity as “damaged goods” is transformed, she is no longer a victim.

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I could go on and on with different situations. It still amazes me how when Jesus shows up on the scene, everything changes. He truly is our Healer. Again, when the root of the problem is changed, it doesn’t take long for all of the fruit of our lives to be changed.

 

Whenever you cannot get in touch with the Lord, it’s always best to just simply ask the Holy Spirit what the blockage is. Sometimes it’s more unforgiveness sometimes it’s shameor may be unbelief.

 

Whatever it is, He will be faithful to reveal it. Please understand it is not a spiritual luxury for you to be healed. It is God’s express purpose for your life. It is your spiritual responsibility. If you take one step forward, the Lord will run to meet you.

 

Another way to receive healing is through getting in touch with what triggers us or causes us to over react or to act childish. We may act it out in our behaviour or it just might be the feelings and thoughts that we have learned to hide on the inside of us. They are evidence that we need more healing.

 

All we have to do is ask the Lord to show us why we are feeling like a scared child? And He will. All you have to do is ask the Lord to show you why you want to punch your husband every time he touches you in a certain way. He will show you why.

 

I [Amanda] had triggers, not related to sexual abuse but to emotional abuse that my husband and I named “my Vietnam flashbacks “. No, I was never in the army or in Vietnam. It simply reminded both of us that my over reaction was not his fault and was stemming out of past experiences.

 

As we took each one of those experiences to the Lord through forgiveness and receiving His healing, the incidents of anger and rage got less and less. It is very rare now for me to be triggered.

 

But every time I am, I choose not to beat myself with condemnation but to press in to the root of my behaviour. It leads me to more and more healing.

 

My husband and family don’t have to condemn me and tell me that I am a Christian and a minister and judge me for responding in the flesh.

 

They can pray for me and ask the Lord to show me what is really going on and then rejoice with me when I share my next level of healing.

It makes such a difference in your Christian walk to quit blaming other people for your reactions and behaviour and to seek God for the real answers.

 

Credits – Amanda Buys

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