The first step of recovery is to admit it.
This is a difficult area to admit addiction in, especially for men. They want to attribute it to sexual prowess and manhood.
When actually it is just the opposite, it is because their manhood is not secure hence always feel they have to prove themselves in the sexual arena.
Sexual addictions can include pornography, masturbation, intercourse, picking up prostitutes, etc.
Any sexual behaviour can become addicting.
As with food addiction, sex addictions are difficult to deal with because we were created as sexual beings. Just as we were created to eat food, we were created to have sexual desires.
“Most addictions are fought through abstinence.”
✳️“Just don’t drink any more.”
✳️“Just don’t do drugs any more.”
✳️“Stop the behaviour.”
✳️“Don’t feed the addiction and it will die.”
That is difficult when it comes to food and sexual addictions because we are not called to abstain. We are just called to moderation and temperance.
The fruit of the Holy Spirit of self-control (Galatians 5:23) is essential to overcoming addictions. People need the Baptism of the Holy Spirit to give them power over sin.
Jesus said in Acts 1:8 that we would receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon us and that it would give us the ability to be a witness. It is hard to be a witness for God when we are powerless over sin.
Acts 1:8 But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.’
In Luke 11:13, it tells us that all we have to do is ask the Father for the Holy Spirit and He will give the Holy Spirit to us. It’s simple.
Luke 11:13 If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!’
Ask and you shall receive. The Apostle Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 14:4 that we edify ourselves when we speak in tongues. That means our spirit man is strengthened and built up. Our spirit man has to get strong to be able to take authority over our soul that is ruled by addiction.
1st Corinthians 14:4 Anyone who speaks in a tongue edifies themselves, but the one who prophesies edifies the church.
I am yet to see people find true freedom from addictions without the power of the Holy Spirit. Freedom is not waking up every morning and fighting. It is just that – freedom.
The desire, the control that the addiction had is gone. Coping skills are no longer needed.
We may need help getting to total freedom, but total freedom should be our goal.
Paul also tells us in 1 Corinthians 14:2 that when we pray in tongues we speak mysteries to God. The exciting thing that happens when we speak mysteries to God, He speaks mysteries back to us.
1st Corinthians 14:2 For anyone who speaks in a tongue does not speak to people but to God. Indeed, no one understands them; they utter mysteries by the Spirit.
Our communication and intimacy with God must be renewed through worship, prayer and Bible study.
The hunger void that people try to fill through sexual addiction is a hunger for intimacy. True intimacy starts with intimacy with the Lord and then flows over to intimacy with others.
It is also important that the addict renews their mind. They have many ungodly beliefs that need changing for recovery to take place. Some of those ungodly beliefs might sound like the following:
🔅I can’t live without (fill in the blank).
🔅My addiction doesn’t affect anyone but me. I just can’t control it.
🔅I’m not really addicted, I just like it.
🔅If people really knew me, they would reject me.
🔅It doesn’t matter how I act out as long as I repent.
🔅It’s not manly to show emotions or talk about your feelings. No one really understands.
I pray that you’ve been dealing with any sexual addiction, you are seeing light at the end of the tunnel. Let’s discuss more of this is the next post.
Credits- Amanda Buys