RESTORING YOUR SEXUALITY 7 – Sexual Damage


As we go deeper, I believe there is need to differentiate between sexual damage and sexual abuse. There are sometimes we can’t figure out what is wrong with us sexually. We know we were not sexually abused or molested so what is the matter with us? Sexual damage can occur in a variety of ways.

Living in a household where there is no proper modesty can damage a child and imprint them sexually.

Here is an example. A ten year old boy comes home every day to find his mother on the couch with just a bra on and he also sees her nursing his baby sister. As an adult he develops a breast fetish. His wife is angry because he is always noticing other women’s breasts. He thinks he is attracted to large breasts. Yes, but only because of his sexual imprinting.

The lack of modesty created sexual damage.

It would be called a Level One form of sexual abuse. Most people are unaware of such terminology and we will just call it sexual damage. But once again, if he is not aware of the damage, he will not know how to get set free and he may even repeat the sin of immodesty in his own family.

There can be sexual damage and shame created simply from having played ‘doctor’ with the next door neighbor as a child.

Many times in inner healing memories of such incidents will come back for the Lord to heal. Why? Because we were built with an inside sin detector even when we are too young to know it is sin.

↘️Damage can come from the children hearing their parents have sex if they are in the same room.

Fear of the sexual act might enter in because they don’t know what they are hearing or seeing. Many times parents fool themselves and believe the children are sleeping. I have counseled many people who were not sleeping. It affected them sexually.

↘️Sometimes a family will just be crude about sexual issues. Jokes will be told. Things will be talked about that make a child uncomfortable.

↘️Maybe there are items in the house that are sexual in nature. It gives a child a perverted view of his sexuality. He is damaged.

↘️Or maybe just the opposite occurs, sex is never discussed, affection is never shown. The general attitude is that sex is shameful and dirty. Sexual damage has occurred. The shame of the family regarding sexual issues has been, without a word, transferred to the child. Many times this occurs in very religious homes. The child is confused and never feels comfortable expressing his sexuality as an adult.

↘️Sometimes we can be teased as children about various body parts. They are too small, too big, etc. As adults, we don’t know why we feel uncomfortable undressing in the light. We prefer the dark. Why? Because we still feel shame.

We may have totally forgotten how we were teased but are sexuality was damaged. But the Lord can heal it, all we have to do is forgive them and ask Him! Many times our body image has to be healed so we can feel comfortable expressing ourselves sexually.

↘️Becoming sexually active at too young of an age,creates sexual damage. Children are not emotionally equipped to handle what is happening to them. Their sexuality robs them of the freedom and innocence of their childhood. Confusion enters in and as they become adults, they have problems truly enjoying sex.

On one hand they enjoy the physical pleasure but on a deeper emotional level, they are angry at sex because of the robbery of their childhood. While other kids were out playing, they were dealing with feelings of shame and fear.

When other children had the freedom of friends and relationships, they felt the oppression of a relationship with responsibilities and problems like a marriage without the maturity to deal with it. Damage has occurred which can affect their sexuality as well as their marriage.

As you can see from these examples, sexual damage can come in many different forms. The key is to recognize it and see how it affects. We need the Lord to help us do that.

Any sort of sexual damage needs healing or it will affect our sexuality. Jesus is the Lord who heals us. He is our Great Physician, Jahweh Rapha, but we have not because we ask not (James 4:2-3). Ask the Lord to show you areas of sexual damage in your life and let Him heal you.

I pray right now for the prophetic anointing of God to be released in your life so that you can hear and know His voice and see what He wants to show you. Most of the time, we do not hear an audible voice. We hear thoughts within our own mind, but somehow we know these are not our thoughts.

This is not our voice; this is the voice of God. We see pictures, but these pictures are different.

They do not come from our imagination or even out of our own memories. They come from the Spirit of the Lord. We need the prophetic anointing of God to be released in our life to pursue sexual healing.

Only God can bring back memories that we have long forgotten. But if they are necessary for our healing, He retrieves them from His archives and brings them back to our mind. God is not bound in time. He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. He can enter our lives at any time He chooses. He is in our past, our present and our future.

Assignment
Pray and ask the Lord to show you areas of sexual damage in your life. Rely on Him and not your own memory. Write down what He shows you.

Forgive those involved and then receive a touch from the Lord and healing in that area of your life. Jesus is just waiting for the opportunity.
Credits – Amanda Buys

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