How often do you approach your child or talk to him or her and they show your obvious signs of fear? I have had my share of it. My little girl would sometimes walk backwards as I approached her. It caused me pain to see that kind of reaction so I had to check how I treated and reacted to her. With time, the cowering response turned into a hug and a peck.
That does not mean that I stopped disciplining her. It is the mode of action that changed. From a shouted order to a calm instruction. From abrupt punishment, to a calm talk and restrained action. Some may not agree with it but it worked for me.
It is not only isolated to disciplining, it is also with how we react to ugly situations. Do you lose your temper because you have missed the mark or messed up something? It affects your children. Rachel Macy Stafford explains that in her article, Two Words That Can Bring You Back to Peaceful Territory. We are not perfect, we shall have our moments of getting angry, saddened, frustrated. However, how long do we stay in these states?
As parents, we need to learn how to calm ourselves down regardless of the circumstance. Our children should not view us emotional failures or parenting as a task that drains one of all self control. Is it a messed up floor, a flooding bathroom or a terribly stained cloth? Whatever it is, come back home, as Rachel says.
The write-up, Managing Screen Time Increases Family Joy by Rachel Macy Stafford, threw a lot of weight behind the issue of spending more valuable time with our children.
Do not be fooled, children notice everything we do and make a mental note. Just like Rachel says, we need to inculcate into our children habits by doing them.
Do you want your child to appreciate the beauty of literature? Start by doing that yourself. Pick a book every week and actually read it. Then you could engage your little one in a conversation about what you have read. It shan’t be long before he or she is devouring every book in their path.
If you are the kind whose face is always buried in your phone, do not blame your child if every spare time is spent before a television screen. So much so that when you call out their name, they can barely hear you.
There is a saying, hope I get it right, ‘I fear for the day that technology takes over human interaction, won’t we breeding idiots?’ As callous as it sounds, it is true. Human interaction keeps us sane and humane to some extent. My prayer is that we shall not leave technology to become our babies’ sitters and companions.
It has been a busy week but it has made me realize what having a blog takes. It is commitment, love and energy. It is almost like nurturing a child. You impart more into your child when you give him or her more of your time. You can not expect much when you are always busy for them. That is not to judge parents that have to leave very early in the morning and return late when the little ones are already in bed. It is just a reminder to us that the time we give to our children matters.
They understand that you need to work to put food on the table. However, they need your time. So however small that time maybe that you get to spend with them, make it matter. You shall have given them something to cherish and look forward to.
I pray that as you go about your life, you do not get too swamped to spare a few minutes to bath in the love that your children have to offer as you shower them with yours. It is the small things that count.
Photo credits: http://www.foter.com
Everyday is full of surprises and new things to embrace. When I started on this journey of blogging, I dd not know how well I would fair seeing that I had failed a number of times.
I thank those that take the time to read my posts, those that comment and those that follow me.
I have learned a lot from the many virtual friends I have made. However the one that tops it all is the appreciation of life.
If I were to nominate anyone for an award, you guys would take it all. None is insignificant. You all bring something new to my table called LIFE.
May God richly bless you and keep you alive. Love you.
I know it is trendy to wear those tight jeans. I also understand that it is trendy to wear those tight undergarments. However, do you understand how they affect you? Take, for example the tight pants or jeans, they cause your bones to get so tight. Or is it better to say that as your bones grow, which they are at that stage, your tight jeans inhibit them from taking up the natural shape. Rather, your jeans or pants give them a new shape that is not great when giving birth.
Then the tight undergarments do not give your private parts the ability to breath. That gives rise to one infection after another yet you are a virgin.
Besides that, those tight jeans do not give room for your skin to breath. Therefore when the skin releases waste that is meant to get passed out through the pores on your skin, your tight jeans create a barrier. Therefore the waste goes back into your body. That gives rise to many tumors such as fibrosis.
It is great to get something that is fitting. However, it needs to be loose to some extent; comfortably loose.
It is great to be trendy, however, you need to do it with caution and wisdom. Not every trendy is good for you or your health.
Psalm 127:4-5 says, “Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate.
Think about it. Family is where children belong. It’s in the family that they build their self-confidence, patience, obedience, and many other virtues. JM on the family construction site mentions that, “Our children know they are loved. However, if we want them to become active and confident members of the family we must make them feel that their contributions are absolutely necessary. Children may often feel like tenants instead of owners in their own home. The more they feel essential to the smooth running of the family, the more of a team atmosphere can be created”.
While parents must ensure that children come and pose no threat to their union- do not separate them in any way, they must also make sure that they define the place of their children in the home. Children play a vital role in the existence of the family. Their presence doesn’t mean monetary disaster- parents and guidians should never look at it that way. They are a blessing in the home; they bring joy and happiness to the home. They give your home its definition. That also means we need to care about spending time with them especially in their infancy so we can actually contribute to the development of their character. JM goes on to say, “It is a fact that we spend time with those things in our lives that are most important to us. Giving your children the gift of your precious time during their first five or six years will be a lasting investment. As time goes on, our kids need us less and less and look to their peers for companionship. Our morals, values, attitudes and perceptions of life can be passed on during these crucial years and will be the seed you plant in the heart of each of your children.” Happy parenting and Homing
Lead Consultant and Director
Child Protection Consult LTD
P.O Box 6333, Kampala, TEL: 0752628946