“When the praises go up, the blessings come down.”

As our worship goes up to God, He opens the windows of heaven and pours out blessings we won’t have enough room to receive. So, determine to worship, for God’s sake, for your husband’s sake and for your own sake.

Press past feelings.

Press past anger.

Forgive and forgive again.

Press past the weariness.

Press past the veil of your own previous perceptions and enter into the place of blessing. Respond to your husband as unto God, and God will meet you there and bless you both.

As incense lingers in the air long after it has finished burning, so will your worship in the bedroom fill the rest of your home and affect the lives of your children as they bask in the security of the love they see between you and your husband.

Let your tendencies switch from holding back from him to giving to him. Press past the fear that he will trample over your giving for God is working on him as you choose to do His will.


Dear Heavenly Father, as I bow before Your throne, I worship You in thought, in word, in deed. I now release my tongue to render praise, and to give honour where honour is due. I declare that I will be filled with delight every time I bless someone with praise. I will help others celebrate the gifts and the blessings You grant to all of Your children. I receive forgiveness for using praise and worship as a tool of punishment by withholding them.

I receive your cleansing from anger and the pain of offences. I refuse to hold grudges and I refuse to seek to strike back at the hearts of those who wound me, whether knowingly or unknowingly. I cleanse myself with the blood of Jesus. I release myself from everything that binds me from being free to worship. Guide me to the Holy of Holies. You surround me with Yourself as I lift up praise and honour to You. And as You engulf me with Your Spirit, I share that which You release over me with others I encounter. You are with me throughout every room of my home, my work place and anywhere my feet touch. I render praise to You. In Jesus’ Name, AMEN.

Credit – Amanda Buys

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Who is the Proverbs 31 woman?? Stick around to know




Picking up from where we stopped on worship, praise and sex, purification in the natural begins with bathing, preparing your body to be pleasing to your partner. Women bleed at the first sexual encounter – this is the passage through the blood in the natural. Virginity is a type of the best sacrifice. The burning coals and incense are now replaced by the passion, appreciation and praise you shower on one another throughout your intimate encounter.

You are totally yielding, giving everything you have, everything you are, to one another – completely pouring out but being filled at the same time.

This is worship in its purest form. There is also wrong worship – Aaron’s sons died when they offered the wrong fire and incense before God. Sex outside of marriage brings death to our spirits, as well as to our sense of well-being; also physical death (AIDS, abortions, etc).

1 COR 6:13, 18-20 Food is intended for the stomach and the stomach for food, but God will finally end the functions of both and bring them to nothing. The body is not intended for sexual immorality, but is intended for the Lord, and the Lord is intended for the body to save, sanctify and raise it again.

Shun immorality and all sexual looseness; flee from impurity in thought, word or deed. Any other sin which a man commits is one outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received as a Gift from God? You are not your own, you were bought with a price. So then, honour God and bring glory to Him in your body.

Single women must learn how to worship God – this will fulfil your need for becoming one with another as a single person. It will help your struggle to walk in a life of purity. Worship will help you get through those difficult times. If you don’t direct your worship toward God, you will direct it elsewhere. That is what Satan hopes for. He comes to steal worship from singles by causing them to fall into sin.

From the beginning, Satan’s whole mission was to steal worship and praise in any form. He comes to steal, kill and destroy your praise and worship to God and the worship in your bedroom.

So, he will give you a headache, cause your husband to be insensitive, influence the kids to cause upset, use the circumstances of the day to wear you down – whatever it takes! He wants to shut down the ministry of worship in your home.

Sex was not just created for multiplying. It was created to release tension, re-centre your soul back to the garden, make the world and all its trouble fade away and reinstate the oneness between man and woman.

It parallels the act of communion, the joining of your spirits as you partake of Christ in the symbolic receiving the bread and the fruit of the vine, absorbing Him fully. In this we are healed, made whole again, saturated with His life within us.

PROV 5: 18, 19 Let your fountain of human life be blessed with the rewards of fidelity, and rejoice in the wife of your youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant doe, tender, gentle, attractive – let her bosom satisfy you at all times, and always be transported with delight in her love.

SONG OF SOL 4:10 How beautiful is your love, my sister, my promised bride! How much better is your love than wine! And the fragrance of your ointments than all spices!

SONG OF SOL 7:8-10 I resolve that I will climb the palm tree; I will grasp its branches. Let your breasts be like clusters of the grapevine, and the scent of your breath like apples, and your kisses like the best wine – then the Shulammite interrupted, that goes down smoothly and sweetly for my beloved shepherd, kisses gliding over his lips while he sleeps! She proudly said, I am my beloved’s and his desire is toward me!

Sex is worship; it is communion; it is ministry; it is a marital duty ordained by God. To withhold it in order to punish your mate is sin. Get rid of the offence. Talk, communicate, let your husband know your needs. Influence him to become a better lover. Don’t lecture him! Let the learning lesson be fun. Let God instruct you on how to please one another.

Problems With Intimacy

Several things could be the cause:

  • Mental conditioning: When you were growing up, sex was spoken of as a “dirty thing” and you were never taught to see it as a celebration according to God’s design. Sex was a deep, dark secret, something you had to do in marriage, so you would just grind your teeth and bear it when the time came.
  • Sexual abuse: God can heal your heart and your mind and make the beauty of His design for sex a reality to you.
  • It can also be a physical problem: hormones, etc.

You may be like I was back then, bewildered at how to do things right or to enjoy sex. I have learned to let go, and let God. I am not being spiritual here but you see, I had a lot of bittereness about promises unmet, and things I didn’t like about my husband. But when I asked the Lord to help me forgive, He did and the journey towards healing started.


Credits – Amanda Buys

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Continuing with the issue of communication and praise, we delve into worship; sex is a type of worship. Adam and Eve were holy and pleasing to God. They were naked and unashamed. After the fall, they ran for cover. The cover conceived separation, separation nurtured secrets and secrets evolved into mistrust and blame, which gave root to isolation.

From there, isolation gave root to territorialism, and territorialism gave birth to war = war between the sexes. Even after men and women married, the war continued. The invisible weapons of warfare would strike at the inner core of one another’s beings.

Sex is one natural parallel to the spiritual act of worship. The spiritual act of worship began with the atonement process – the path of offences had to be cleared before encountering a Holy God (purifying the body, the shedding of blood, entering in Holy of Holies bearing burning coals and incense to present to the Lord). We confess our sins, repent and turn away from sin, never to revisit it again.

When a man has hurt or offended a woman, his first instinct is to make love because it is difficult for him to express remorse effectively. It is his way of saying he’s sorry.

In many ways, the woman reflects God’s heart. Everything about her body is fashioned to nurture life – her breasts give milk, her arms hold and comfort and her womb carries and gives birth to living souls on the earth.

But, like God, she finds it hard to receive from man when she is offended. Her body is in a sense like the Holy of Holies. The offences that stand between us must be cleared away.

But we can simplify are marriages; not to say that it’s easy but it’s a choice worth making, by learnng to forgive. Wife, do not burn the bridges with your husband because he has hurt you. Like the Father, forgive.

Credit – Amanda Buys

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Portrait Of Young Couple Sitting In Park

When I was few years in my marriage, I had several grievances. They ate me up so bad that I contemplated divorce, mhh. But along the way, the Lord has blessed me with people that have guided me and helped me understand a thing or two. It is these that I desire to share;

How do two people lose their way in a relationship? Communication breakdown.

What bridges the gap between them? Understanding.

Men need appreciation, honour, respect…worship in a sense. We have been made in God’s image and it is natural for all of us to seek praise and adoration.

Men don’t usually handle criticism well; they just flee until you get over it. If it occurs too often, they just avoid you altogether and go elsewhere in search of praise.

Watch your mouth! The power of changing how that man relates to you lies in your hands and in your tongue.

Praise blesses and liberates people. To withhold praise is to punish. It is to render the other person to the deepest depths of insecurity, misery and meaninglessness. Withholding praise can be a subtle case of manipulation.

Praise is as much for you as it is for the other person. It is your way of reminding yourself why you are blessed to have this person in your life. It releases you from harbouring past hurts or slipping into bitterness. It stirs up the desire within that person to be the best that he can be for you. He doesn’t want to let you down.

Insist on praising, not because they have done tremendous things, but because you would relish that praise if you were in their place. And it is a better thung to look for the good in some one than focus on their wrongs.


Credit – Amanda Buys

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Ladies, we need to enroll in the class of ‘stepping back’ especially when it comes to your children. It is important that you allow your man room to step up into his role. Make your needs known to him and then step back. It may be so difficult to do more so if you’ve been doing everything by yourself but man craves respect and praise.

“I need” are good words to use with men because they have planted in their spirits a God given drive to fix things and to restore order. If a man feels like you’ve got it covered, he will allow you to take the whole ball and run with it.

Therefore, step back and let a man rise or fall on his own. This is where the muscles of character are built.

We don’t like to watch the struggle. It looks too painful, but don’t stop the process. God holds him accountable as He held Adam accountable to fulfil his entire call as a man. He gave men certain strengths that women do not possess and vice versa.


Dear Heavenly Father, I receive forgiveness for allowing myself to be swept away by my own expectations. I receive forgiveness for having invested misguided hope in a man when my hope should have been in You. You alone are my source of peace and joy. You alone can make me fruitful in a way that is pleasing to You and fulfilling to me. As I cast my cares upon You because You care for me, I declare that my eyes are open to see Your willing participation in my life on a daily basis, even in the little things. I receive forgiveness for allowing myself to be filled with disappointment, frustration and resentment. At times I feel angry with You as I begin to buy into the lie that You have failed me. It is really I who have failed myself by demanding more of myself than You do. But now I choose to relax and let go. I thank You that You take care of the things for which I feel falsely responsible. I receive the wisdom to know when I should take hold and when I should let go. I receive guidance by Your Holy Spirit so as not to fall prey to my own fearful instincts. As I rest in You, I thank You that You will keep that which I have committed into Your hands, now and evermore. In Jesus’ Name, AMEN.

Cedits – Amanda Buys.

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Do you find it almost impossible  to praise and appreciate people. Keep it here, and we will negotiate through those waters too😊





Is your husband or the desire for a man in your life taking the place of God?

Are you making demands he can do nothing about?

Is there a void in you that is robbing you of the happiness that could be yours regardless of your circumstance?

Many of us expect the man to produce peace, self -worth, validation or even material things. God is ultimately our source of all these treasures.

We will strive, weep and deprive ourselves of opportunities to live a full life if we put our hope in a person to fulfil our expectations.

While I may sympathize with you, the truth is when our sights get set on the arm of flesh, we will always be let down. Man can only do so much, but God can do any and everything.

It is not a man who will make our lives fruitful, but rather our own yielding to God’s call to fulfil our purpose through the use of our gifts and talents.

We must live for the moment, making the best of every occasion to lift the spirits of those around us – then our world will change for the better and  will become more joyful and productive.




“If I don’t do this or that, it won’t get done!”

Men are creatures whose need is in doing or let’s say, rescuing, so until you create a void for him to fill, he will not rise to the occasion.

Sometimes a man needs to acquire a limp to find his place in God. Keep your expectations intact; let him know that you expect him to be the man he’s supposed to be. Follow that through by leaving the space for whatever he is supposed to be doing vacant. Do not rescue him from his own negligence.

Credits – Amanda Buys.

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Ladies, do you know that sometimes our own insecurities can cause us to demand things from men that are not humanly possible for them to give? Yes, it’s the truth.

When the man in our life doesn’t seem to assist us in being fruitful – be it pregnancy, financial assistance or just plain happiness – why do we still feel empty and unfulfilled, even after marriage?

There is a place in our hearts that only God can fill. It is important for us to  understand the revelation that fruitfulness comes from the Lord, not from man. God’s command to Adam and Eve in the Garden was to be fruitful and multiply. The individual call was to bear fruit; the mutual call was to multiply. God would meet them in the process and add to what they produced.

Fruitfulness is where our true contentment lies, and God Himself makes this possible.

LEV 26:9 For I will be leaning toward you with favour and regard for you, rendering you fruitful, multiplying you, and establishing and ratifying My covenant with you.

We cannot blame anyone but ourselves for our lives being barren of fruit. God has commanded us to be fruitful. He has equipped us to be fruitful, whether single or married.

No human being should affect your fruitfulness, unless they are adding to it by provoking you to greater good works. If they are subtracting from you, causing your fruit to wither or grow bitter, you should reconsider why you associate with that person.

Are you still puzzled about why despite all you’ve put into a relationship some areas of your life still feel dead? It’s  because that is for God not man to do🙂


Credits – Amanda Buys.

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